Posts Tagged ‘aubergines’

15 July

Phoenix Audience Poem - Aubergine

I’ve been remiss and not sent up the audience poem from the wonderful night at the Phoenix. They opted to investigate the aubergine, and were pretty pleased with what they came up with - quite rightly, I think. Aubergines what are you like?

 

Aubergines – an egg’s ugly cousin

Purple and sexy you make me smile

Saviour of my cheap night in

Aubergines,

Oversized liquorice jellybeans

Lick-able like me

The purple shiny skin of a sweaty bald patch

Plummy, roundy, purple bumbly

Green pokey stalk

Aubergines have feelings too

A personified bruise

An English pear with a suntan

Aubergines, broken dreams, silent screams

Aubergines are fancier than Under-gines

Rakish squishy pulpy thing

The big but small fruit of life

It’s like a giant tomato but purple and slimy

My love is like an Aubergine: big hearted, shiny and delicious barbequed

Aubergines you’re fat and thin, you’re purple like a lucid dream

In America they’re called Eggplants, either way they’re beautiful

Aubergines would make good weapons of mass destruction, if they weren’t soft

Black dummies for big babies

Dressed up marrows

Aubergines are a culinary challenge

A Greek holiday with Germans

The colour of our bathroom suite, the colour of my wedding suit

Goodbye Aubergines…

Aubergines are difficult to shove up your arse.

 

By the people of Exeter and put together by Beryl the Feral The audience liked it all, but especially the last line…