This poem was inspired by a recent article in the Sun newspaper.

THE SURVEY

Mark Roberts has hosted Swingers Parties for ten years and says:

"Young people are a lot more open-minded these days.

It's another of those experiences that they want to try

like going to the theatre, or back-packing in Paraguay".

Mark has done a survey of six thousand swingers -

they're not what you may think- fat bald older men and mingers:

they're mainly white, middle-class and under the age of thirty

with careers in PR or the media, they're adventurous and flirty.

They're usually uni graduates, well-read and rather bright

and generally they swing about once a fortnight.

He found that women called Catherine and blokes called Paul

are the names of those most likely to attend a Swinger's Ball.

Mark, David, Andrew, Sarah, Emma or Clare

are the next most popular monikers of folk to be found there.

The survey didn't mention any of these names:

Roger, Dick or Fanny, Willie or James.